Posts Tagged With: thought



There was a time when I had not a concern in the world….and then I was born.  It’s amazing the things I found to be stressful as a child.  Having to make new friends at school was absolutely terrifying for me, being an introvert.  Having to learn math and spelling and grammar and history and learning to deal with the cliques….it was stressful, to say the least, and led to many sleepless nights.

These anxieties continued throughout my school years, with the inclusion of having to learn geometry, trigonometry, calculus, the sciences, foreign languages, more clearly defined cliques.  Life had become quite the challenge.  Most days I didn’t want to even get out of bed, but if I didn’t get out of bed, I wouldn’t go to school and if I didn’t go to school, I would have to endure it all again next year with a whole new pool of people.

FINALLY, I managed to graduate high school!  The sense of freedom was incredible…until my parents gave me the choice of going to college, joining the military, or getting a job. So off to college I went.  The first year was the absolute worst, again because of being an introverted introvert.  It’s not that I didn’t like people and wasn’t sociable….I was just extremely awkward around people and even more so in social situations.  But I put on my calm face and followed Shakespeare’s “Henry V” by going “Once more into the breach”.

Throughout the bits of my life that I remember, I was seeking to be absent from the world by finding that place where could fit in and be accepted.

Fast forward through the misery that was college and the 8 years of military and a divorce and I now find myself still seeking that place where I can find peace and fit in.  While I have no clue where to find it, I do know what sort of place it is that I feel most at peace.

I like quiet.  I like the environment to be of cool climate.  I like a gentle breeze.  I would like something of a stream or other water.  In a place like this, I could find peace.  There would be no expectation of having to deal with others.

I once thought such a place truly existed.  But am now not so sure.  If it does exist, it is beyond my reach at present and the feeling out of place in this world continues.

Categories: Hmmmmm........, Perspectives | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Who? Did WHAT?


I am a curious sort and, as a result, many questions flow through my brain seeking answers or, at least, clues to answers.

  •  Whilst printing an email this morning, my mind wandered off to pose the question: Who decided the standard size of paper to be 8.5″x11″?
  •  I then read an article about the MOST EXPENSIVE coffee in the world…kopi luwak from Sumatra.  Apparently, the Civet Cat eats the coffee cherries and then poops out the beans.  Now…..I have an addiction to coffee.  I love coffee!  I drink lots of coffee.  But the voices in my head united as one to ask the question: “The most expensive coffee in the world is found in cat poop?” Who was the person who figured this out?  I can’t speak for anyone else, but as much as I love coffee, digging through cat crap to get a cup of coffee will most definitely cure my addiction post haste!
  • Next I saw an advert for Fiji Water which claims to be bottled at the source without being touched by human hands.  How does water flow from the source, into pipes (made by human hands or machinery made by human hands), and then into PLASTIC bottles (made by human hands or machinery made by human hands), and then into the stores?  How do we know this isn’t the result of some guy with a garden hose mucking about in his garden filling up plastic bottles and laughing himself silly as his bank account just grows and grows?
  • Next came an advert for the Fiat 500.  This minuscule auto is not much larger than a golf cart and was intended to be the competition for the Mini Cooper and the Smart Car.  Yet, according to the advert, if you “accidentally” drop a Viagra tablet into the fuel tank, the docile Fiat 500 becomes all bulked up into a bit of a rager.  So should your Fiat 500 remain in this bulked up state for more than 4 hours, should one consult their local garage?

Other miscellaneous ponderings include such issues as:

  • Who decided how much water it would take to make poop disappear down the pipes?
  • Who decided a red light meant STOP, unless you are in a brothel quarter and then it has a completely different meaning.
  • Why does a scantily clad woman become offended when the Average Joe looks are her displayed wares?
  • If we are all so much alike, why do I like quiet while others prefer loud?
  • Why do we never see human heads stuffed and mounted on the walls of animal homes?
  • Who was the one who got to decide that scratching where it actually itches in “inappropriate”?
  • Why do the “Standard Size” windows seem to change when I need to have one replaced or re-glassed?
  • Why do women wear brasseries that “Lift and Separate” but when the lifted and separated are noticed by men, the men are told “eyes up here”?

These are just a few of my mental wanderings.

Categories: Wanderer's Wonderings | Tags: , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

In The Quiet Stillness

Contemplative StrollQuiet is the best atmosphere my mind enjoys. Quiet, though never silent.  Time when thoughts coalesce and form from the fragments scattered in the mists. Thinking is a wonderful hobby. Contemplating and pondering.

Had someone recently tell me that I was odd for enjoying thoughtful times of quiet. It is they who are odd, for expecting their opinion to change who I am. It has taken a long time for me to accept who I am, and even to like who I am. So there!

A nugget of wisdom I wish to pass along, if I might:

“There is no failure except the failure to try.”

Accept who you are, or accept who others want you to be. Your choice, your life. Take a stroll and mull it over.

I am Paul, and I am an introvert!



Categories: Hmmmmm........ | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Hype? Don’t Need It!

Don’t Need The Hype!

Every once in a while, I feel compelled to share a rant.  This one has been gnawing on my cranial closets for quite some time and has, thus, fermented enough to be let fly before it explodes. I am not a fan or disciple of hype, by any stretch of the imagination.  

Don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy encouragement, but not the fakery of hype.  

  • If you wish me to learn, teach me so I may learn.  
  • If you wish my support, inspire me by fulfilling your word, not with loud rah-rah speeches
  • If you wish my loyalty, convince me through intellect.
  • Emotions are fleeting and change with the mood. Do not appeal to my emotions, for that is not lasting.  

In short, I will kneel before no one.  I will, however, give my loyalty to those who prove to be loyal.  If you‘re idea of appeal is through the loud and the hype…..keep moving, there’s no one home here.   

Categories: Hmmmmm........, Koffee Klatch, Perspectives, Wanderer's Wonderings, Wandering Mind | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

What’s It To You?


I’m one of those people who try to see things from a different perspective.  It doesn’t always work, but it does work more often now than it once did.  Takes a conscious effort, but it is most definitely a learnable feat.  It seems that as we mungle through our lives, we slowly become cynical.  When we were children, we were optimistic and everything was exciting and new.  As we learn to deal with experiences of living, we become tainted, jaded, and cynical. 

We may not have the life that we wanted.  We may not have the experiences we had planned.  We may have even had some horrendous experiences.  But as long as we have breath, we have a choice: either make the best of it and adapt, or surrender and be defeated. 

Some will look at this photo and see only a missing pane of glass.  Some will look at this as a repair that needs to be done (not to mention painting and wood replacement).  And some will see something artistically beautiful about it.  That’s not to say I would want to live there without the repairs, but for a moment, I can see and appreciate the beauty.

Cynicism is a drudge and trudge through life.  Why drudge and trudge?


Categories: Hmmmmm........, Koffee Klatch, Perspectives, Wanderer's Wonderings | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

Wide-Eyed Weirdiousity

Eccentricities!  Let’s be honest, we are ALL eccentric, weird, odd, different, strange, and very unique.  Guess what?  We’re unique just like everyone else!  But it’s our oddities and wide-eyed weirdness that makes us who we are.  Surprised?  Don’t be.  Think about the experiences that have shaped you.  Some are pleasant, like the first time you got to ride a bicycle by yourself.  Some are not so pleasant, like the first spill you took on that bicycle.  And some are down right horrific, like that awkwardity of a first date.


When we are faced with a new experience, we have a choice to make: Either we can let it drain us of our energy or we can let it shape our weirdity.  You are who you are on purpose.  There’s no accident in that.  Be Wide-Eyed Weird and enjoy your eccentricities!

Categories: Hmmmmm........, Koffee Klatch, Perspectives, Wanderer's Wonderings | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Keep Your Sanity To Yourself!


It’s in the silence that we hear life speak.

We bongle through our day, bouncing from scenario to scenario, sometimes from place to place, sometimes from thought to thought, always trying to stay in control of as much of life as we can.  It’s not that we don’t like the odd adventure, but we do seem to have this rather intense desire to control.  Let me change that to MANY of us like to control. 


Yes, I am one of those who like to know what’s going to happen, how it will happen, when it will happen, how often it will happen, and be in control of as much as possible.  Why?  Because if I can control the situation, I can control the outcome.


Sounds logical.  On paper, it diagrams out as a logical argument.  Let’s be brutally honest here…just because I wear a rubber chicken costume does not make me a rubber chicken.  It merely makes me sweat a lot and look rather silly.  Think of yourself as a surfer and life as the ocean.  You won’t always get the perfect wave, because you can’t control the oceans.  BUT, you can learn to ride the waves!


The key to life is simplicity itself: “Life can only be taken one breath at a time.” 


Shhh…that’s the secret.



Categories: Hmmmmm........, Koffee Klatch, Perspectives, Wanderer's Wonderings | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments


Seems like an eternity since I was able to collect my thoughts enough to put them down on “paper”, although in this format they are MUCH more legible, and far less confusing by the stream in which they joogle forth from my consciousness.  Consciousness……there’s a thought worth pondering.  We spend part of our lives unconscious in order to rejuvenate and refresh, yet our minds are bongling around with a gazillion and one thoughts that our consciousness dropped on the doorstep of our unconsciousness and then left the unconscious to manage how the pieces fit together and then grundle them off again into the conscious, where our consciousness either complains of being tired, or simply forgot what it was in the first place is was boogling.

Granted, the last several weeks have put the whammy on me and bashed my serenity like King Kong on a bender, but I’m hoping things have reached a peak, a plateau, if you will, and some sense of peace shall prevail upon the lands once more.  To be determined, of course, but then there’s always that bunch who insists on trying to plant their “I’m Your MASTER” flag on my peaceful spot.  Thus far, have been able to fend them off, but of late their attacks are becoming more vicious.  But enough of that.  I hear their flag fluttering in the wind, and I choose to plant my own, albeit it’s not exactly a flag per se as much as it is a mental image:

My Serene Scene Flag

Something that occurred to me just now…… I’ve given in to the temptation to get all in a blither about all that’s going on, that I’ve lost focus.  I ask for your forgiveness for that.  I have veered way off course and must now find my way back.  Might take a while and a several rabbit trails, but hopefully will be back on the path to weirdiousity soon.  Prayers and thoughts are always welcome.

Categories: Hmmmmm........, Koffee Klatch, Perspectives | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | 18 Comments

Begin At The Beginning…

Why is it so necessary to begin at the beginning?  We just assume that the beginning is a good place to start, but what if there’s not anything notable to report at the beginning?  Why can’t we start from right here and pugger along?

I was very young at the beginning of my beginning, so I don’t remember much.  Some photos were taken, I got footprinted, and generally don’t recall anything momentus.  So I shan’t be beginning there, except to say…..well, there it is! 

I must have had a beginning, else I wouldn’t be here in the middle of this right now, but if I could’ve begun right here, I’m not so sure how that would turn out. 

I do like the way we begin and then follow sequentially along progressively.  I imagine it would be slightly uncomfortable to bounce about the spectrum like a golfball that fell off an overpass.  I mean, today you’re an “adult” and you’ve got your look just the way you want it, then tomorrow you’re a hormone secreting gawk that has “nothing to wear” and can’t be given the least bit of constructive direction (oh wait…….), and then next Thursday you awaken to find that you’re ready to retire and you’re grouchy, crabby, teeth don’t fit right, prune pudding eating…..again, hmmmmmmmmm…..

Point is, as we troggle along this lifeway, we do it in sequence for a reason.  Because it makes sense!  And if we only started a book on page 167, we’d be lost as to the plot and characters, because they were explained at the beginning.  Unless you happen to be reading one of those authors who likes to introduce random characters all throughout the story.  But I digress…..regress…..egress….wait, now I’m just lost!  Oh yes, while it is true that we have to begin at the beginning, we always have the opportunity to make a new beginning! 

Ah HA! And you thought there was no point to this babbling!

Categories: Koffee Klatch, Wanderer's Wonderings | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

The Lost Art

There is an art form I do believe has been all but lost.  Well, perhaps “lost” might be too harsh a word.  “Severely Faded” might be a better turn of phrase for this purpose.  There was a time when one could take time to wander about, gaze upon the world around one in wonder and contemplation, and have a good think…..a ponder, if you will.  Have we truly forgotten how to contemplate, meditate, reason, and think?  Have we become so busy-ness oriented that we have lobotomized the part of our mind that engages in this quickly fading art of thought?

I’m puzzled, befuddled, confusticated, spasmodic, filled with pericombobulations, and altogether disappointed that we no longer have the time or desire to ponder.

Dang kids and their new fangled newfangledness!

Categories: Hmmmmm........, Koffee Klatch | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | 34 Comments

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